Symbiosis and Codependency : Think Church pyramids/Work/Family/Freemasonry or NOT

Symbiosis and symbiotic

Free online Dictionary

sym·bi·o·sis  (smb-ss, -b-)

n. pl. sym·bi·o·ses (-sz)

1. Biology A close, prolonged association between two or more different organisms of different species that may, but does not necessarily, benefit each member.

2. A relationship of mutual benefit or dependence.

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[Greek sumbisis, companionship, from sumbioun, to live together, from sumbios, living together : sun-, syn- + bios, life; see g^wei- in Indo-European roots.]

Wikipedia

Symbiosis (from Ancient Greek σύν "together" and βίωσις "living")^[1] is close and often long-term interaction between two or more different biological species. In 1877, Bennett used the word symbiosis (which previously had been used to depict people living together in community) to describe the mutualistic relationship in lichens.^[2] In 1879, the German mycologist Heinrich Anton de Bary defined it as "the living together of unlike organisms."^[3][4]
The definition of symbiosis is controversial among scientists. Some believe symbiosis should only refer to persistent mutualisms, while others believe it should apply to any types of persistent biological interactions (i.e. mutualistic, commensalistic, or parasitic).^[5]
Some symbiotic relationships are obligate, meaning that both symbionts entirely depend on each other for survival. For example, many lichens consist of fungal and photosynthetic symbionts that cannot live on their own.^[3][6][7][8] Others are facultative, meaning that they can, but do not have to live with the other organism.
Symbiotic relationships include those associations in which one organism lives on another (ectosymbiosis, such as mistletoe), or where one partner lives inside the other (endosymbiosis, such as lactobacilli and other bacteria in humans or Symbiodinium in corals).^[9][10] Symbiosis is also classified by physical attachment of the organisms; symbiosis in which the organisms have bodily union is called conjunctive symbiosis, and symbiosis in which they are not in union is called disjunctive symbiosis.^[11]

Codependency

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Codependency is defined as a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person is controlled or manipulated by another who is affected with a pathological condition (typically narcissism or drug addiction); and in broader terms, it refers to the dependence on the needs of, or control of, another.^[1] It also often involves placing a lower priority on one's own needs, while being excessively preoccupied with the needs of others.^[2] Codependency can occur in any type of relationship, including family, work, friendship, and also romantic, peer or community relationships.^[2] Codependency may also be characterized by denial, low self-esteem, excessive compliance, or control patterns.^[2] Narcissists are considered to be natural magnets for the codependent.

Development and scope of concept

Historically, the concept of codependence "comes directly out of Alcoholics Anonymous, part of a dawning realization that the problem was not solely the addict, but also the family and friends who constitute a network for the alcoholic."^[3] It was subsequently broadened to cover the way "that the codependent person is fixated on another person for approval, sustenance, and so on."^[3] As such, the concept overlaps with, but developed in the main independently from, the older psychoanalytic concept of the 'passive dependent personality' ... attaching himself to a stronger personality."^[4]
Some would retain the stricter, narrower dictionary definition of codependency, which requires one person to be physically or psychologically addicted, such as to heroin, and the second person to be psychologically dependent on that behavior.^[5]

Patterns and characteristics

Codependency describes behaviors, thoughts and feelings that go beyond normal kinds of self-sacrifice or caretaking. For example parenting is a role that requires a certain amount of self-sacrifice and giving a child's needs a high priority, although a parent could nevertheless still be codependent towards their own children if the caretaking or parental sacrifice reached unhealthy or destructive levels.^[2] Generally a parent who takes care of their own needs (emotional and physical) in a healthy way will be a better caretaker, whereas a codependent parent may be less effective, or may even do harm to a child.^[2] Another way to look at it is that the needs of an infant are necessary but temporary whereas the needs of the codependent are constant.
People who are codependent often take on the role of martyr; they constantly put others' needs before their own and in doing so forget to take care of themselves. This creates a sense that they are "needed"; they cannot stand the thought of being alone and no one needing them. Codependent people are constantly in search of acceptance. When it comes to arguments, codependent people also tend to set themselves up as the "victim". When they do stand up for themselves, they feel guilty.
Codependency does not refer to all caring behavior or feelings, but only those that are excessive to an unhealthy degree.^[6] Indeed, from the standpoint of Attachment theory or Object relations theory, "to risk becoming dependent"^[7] may be for the compulsively self-reliant a psychological advance, and "depending on a source outside oneself ... successful, or tolerable, dependence" ^[8] may be valorized accordingly.

Narcissism

Main article: Narcissism

Narcissists, with their ability to "get others to buy into their vision and help them make it a reality," are natural magnets for the "'co-dependent' ... [with] the tendency to put others' need before their own".^[9] Sam Vaknin considered that codependents, as "the Watsons of this world, 'provide the narcissist with an obsequious, unthreatening audience ... the perfect backdrop.'"^[10] Among the reciprocally locking interactions of the pair, are the way "the narcissist has an overpowering need to feel important and special, and the co-dependent has a strong need to help others feel that way. ... The narcissist overdoes self-caring and demands it from others, while the co-dependent underdoes or may even do almost no self-caring."^[11]
In psychoanalytic terms, the narcissist "who manifests such 'omnipotent' behaviour and who seems to be especially 'independent' exerts an especially fascinating effect on all ... dependent persons ... [who] struggle to participate in the 'omnipotent' narcissist's power":^[12] narcissist and codependent "participate together in a form of an ego-defense system called projective identification."^[13]
Rappoport identifies codependents of narcissists as "co-narcissists.":^[14] "the codependent narcissist gives up his or her own needs to feed and fuel the needs of the other."^[15]

Inverted narcissists

Sam Vaknin—"a self-help author who openly discusses his experiences as a person with narcissistic personality disorder"^[16]—has identified a special sub-class of such codependents as "inverted narcissists."
Inverted or "covert" narcissists are people who are "intensely attuned to others' needs, but only in so far as it relates to [their] own need to perform the requisite sacrifice"—an "inverted narcissist, who ensures that with compulsive care-giving, supplies of gratitude, love and attention will always be readily available ... [pseudo-]saintly."^[17] Vaknin considered that "the inverted narcissist is a person who grew up enthralled by the narcissistic parent ... the child becomes a masterful provider of Narcissistic Supply, a perfect match to the parent's personality."
In everyday life, the inverted narcissist "demands anonymity ... uncomfortable with any attention being paid to him ... [with] praise that cannot be deflected." Recovery means the ability to recognize the self-destructive elements in one's character structure, and to "develop strategies to minimize the harm to yourself."

Recovery

There are various recovery paths for individuals who struggle with codependency.
For example, some may choose behavioral psychotherapy, sometimes accompanied by chemical therapy for accompanying depression.
There also exist support groups for codependency, such as Co-Dependents Anonymous (CoDA), Al-Anon/Alateen, Nar-Anon, and Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACoA), which are based on the twelve-step program model of Alcoholics Anonymous and also Celebrate Recovery a Christian, Bible-based group. Although the term codependency originated outside of twelve-step groups, it is now a common concept in many of them.^[18]
Often an important result of a Family Intervention is to highlight codependent behaviors of various family members. This is sometimes a great help in encouraging the codependent person to accept help.
Many self-help guides have been written on the subject of codependency. One of the first was Codependent No More by Melody Beattie, published in 1987. Beattie has since written several other books on the subject. Other authors include Pia Melody (Facing Co-dependence) and Shirley Smith (Set Yourself Free).
Author Dr. Henry Cloud has written many books on the subject of personal Boundaries, (including one book by that title.)
Mr. Unavailable and the Fallback girl by Natalie Lue is one of the most insightful books into Codependency.

Harmful effects of unaddressed codependency

Unresolved patterns of codependency can lead to more serious problems like alcoholism, drug addiction, eating disorders, sex addiction, and other self-destructive or self-defeating behaviors.^[19] People with codependency are also more likely to attract further abuse from aggressive individuals, more likely to stay in stressful jobs or relationships, less likely to seek medical attention when needed and are also less likely to get promotions and tend to earn less money than those without codependency patterns.^[19]
For some, the social insecurity caused by codependency can progress into full-blown social anxiety disorders like social phobia, avoidant personality disorder or painful shyness.^[19] Other stress-related disorders like panic disorder, depression or PTSD may also be present.^[19]

Symbiosis it seems is quite positive and affirms and empowers both parties.
Have a look at these scriptures with related ideas.

^{1 Corinthians 12 : 4 ff}

Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. ⁵ And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. ⁶ There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons. ⁷ But to each one is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. ⁸ For to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, and to another the word of knowledge according to the same Spirit; ⁹ to another faith ^[d]by the same Spirit, and to another gifts of ^[e]healing ^[f]by the one Spirit, ¹⁰ and to another the ^[g]effecting of ^[h]miracles, and to another prophecy, and to another the ^[i]distinguishing of spirits, to another various kinds of tongues, and to another the interpretation of tongues. ¹¹ But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually just as He wills.
¹² For even as the body is one and yet has many members, and all the members of the body, though they are many, are one body, so also is Christ. ¹³ For ^[j]by one Spirit we were all baptized into one body, whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free, and we were all made to drink of one Spirit.

....... But God has so composed the body, giving more abundant honor to that member which lacked, ²⁵ so that there may be no ^[p]division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. ²⁶ And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is ^[q]honored, all the members rejoice with it.

 Ephesians 3 

 ⁸ To me, the very least of all ^[d]saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unfathomable riches of Christ, ⁹ and to ^[e]bring to light what is the administration of the mystery which for ages has been hidden in God who created all things; ¹⁰ so that the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known through the church to the rulers and the authorities in the heavenly places.

 ^{Ephesians 4}

¹¹ And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, ¹² for the equipping of the ^[d]saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ; ¹³ until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the ^[e]knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature ^[f]which belongs to the fullness of Christ. ^14 [g]As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness ^[h]in deceitful scheming; ¹⁵ but ^[i]speaking the truth in love, ^[j]we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, ¹⁶ from whom the whole body, being fitted and held together ^[k]by what every joint supplies, according to the ^[l]proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.

Codependency Manifests:

Hebrews 13:11-14  sounds adventurous doesn't it?
¹¹ For the bodies of those animals whose blood is brought into the holy place by the high priest as an offering for sin, are burned outside the camp. ¹² Therefore Jesus also, that He might sanctify the people through His own blood, suffered outside the gate. ¹³ So, let us go out to Him outside the camp, bearing His reproach. ¹⁴ For here we do not have a lasting city, but we are seeking the city which is to come.

This passage does too....
Isaiah 54:2 "Enlarge the place of your tent; Stretch out the curtains of your dwellings, spare not; Lengthen your cords And strengthen your pegs." And this also in relation to Christ's Passion in the previous chapter(53)

 So Co-dependency is , in the case of wrong doctrine, when a group starts to be sick because it adheres to empty human tradition rather than to God Himself.

One day I'll share all the prophetic words spoken by people, mostly without any knowledge of me,which describe what God has called me to do. Because of those words I HAVE to take a more fluid approach with the whims of one particular local church. Some of what men say can be accurate, some of it is just the product of men's assumptions and has no lasting authority at all.

Some of you know I stepped on Havant Church's toes when I dared speak about the subject of tithing.

Probably THE MOST symptomatic email reply of an unhealthy co-dependency was this one:

Hi Chris,

As much as I like you as a bloke, and as much as you’re entitled to your views on matters, you’re now running the risk of being divisive.

And you don’t wanna do that….

You know the Bible well, right? You’ll know Titus 3:9-11.

9        But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless.

10      Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that, have nothing to do with him.

11      You may be sure that such a man is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned.

Strong words. Not mine, not yours, God’s. And they’re beginning to apply to you, in my opinion….

This was all said complete with phrases like "(you)trash the leadership"  to the simple teaching of how God does not require a tithe in the New Covenant. God speaks instead only of giving, and giving according to the measure of faith that you have...oh...and joyfully, without compulsion.

When we discuss teachings we must allow that people will have different ideas. The email, and there were several, went beyond a difference of opinion, and started to angrily ascribe false accusations for the simple reason I was of a different opinion. ie I don't believe leaders have any mandate for teaching tithing. It completely undermines the free gospel.

So Co-dependency is , in the case of wrong doctrine, when a group starts to be sick because it adheres to empty human tradition rather than to God Himself.  This also is the entire history of the Jews , who rather than listen to Jesus, adhered to their own group opinions which then became very dangerous ....dangerous to the life of Christ, but dangerous for their people thereafter.

see also this related post