You want to know why I stopped preaching?
The honest truth is that scripture truly cannot be broken (is true)
."out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks"
My heart is filled with anger, misery and disappointment from the physical agony God, that Great Healer, has left me in for 24 years now.
So when I speak, I vomit forth pain, anger and agony.
I could be like most preachers and put on a mask and pretend everything is fine all the time, fine. Now gimme the $$$$....
So were I to speak on God, it would come out something like this:
"Come to Jesus andhave your life ruined too."
Great spokeman, huh?
Then again, the truth shall set you free, right?
End of rant...
You can go back to being free from my agony.
My family can't.
😢
I just fucking wish this would end.
Are you even out there or listen if you are, God
14/5/17 - Chris Welch
Have been most affected by Michael Kaminski today. I remember a few such times with people really going through things. I remember being at my wits end myself. These are not church as normal or prayer as normal situations. Either God moves or we are stuffed.
Recently I have tried replying to people's leftbrain arguments as Jesus sometimes did.... but sometimes the sheer inane futility of leftbrain stuff catches me on the back foot and to quote Dean Dosher my ass starts showing. I hate leftbrain stuff with a satanic undertow. It is not where Christ has put us. It is not our reality. Neither is figleaf living. I don't have to respond to Michael Kaminski out of pressure to look good and say I am praying for him. What Jesus wills and works is up to Jesus and falls in the " don't even tell your right hand what your left is doing." We are the spontaneous Body of the Living Christ. We smash the odd religious mans roof and lower paralysed friends at Jesus feet. Or sometimes don't do nuffink. Or speak afar off, maybe off Facebook.... imagine?..... like Jesus did the centurions child. We can't work this stuff. I didn't premeditate the epileptic mother of the house being instantly healed in a flash. Our church at Emsworth never premeditated speaking healing over Tony Fitzgerald wife( many of you know him now on God TV.) we were minding our business just loving on Jesus and Psalm123 style Jesus directed us to command healing on Tony's wife dying in a Brighton hospital bed 40 miles away. At exactly 11 am that very minute that Sunday she got better and was soon out. Tony used to call us Abundant Poverty..... because we were never really very big on lucrative businesses and much Holy Spirit biz know how.... well not then. But Tony respected Ian McCulloch and knew Jesus was amongst us.
What I am trying to say is we don't have to look flash.... just carry His Life like the priests carried the Ark. We don't tell God which bit of the Kingdom is next.... we fix our eyes on Him. Sure we bring each other to Him.... but He is Lord even of that. He is good because He is good. He doesn't need or require our measuring sticks and clipboards. If He does nothing with our generation. If like the Israelites, we are just the nobodies recorded in the Bible somewhere in the 400 years the Israelites were in Egypt.... sayyear 200... and God doesn't move in deliverance.... God is still good fashioning the inner cry of desperation that is later going to move a Moses, defeat a Pharoah, and release a generation out of Egypt into a wilderness and Land.
God remains good. He is always doing something. But unlike denominational religion.... we remain expectant because as I have seen proved, at any time His flashes of power can instantly heal and deliver.
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Chris Welch It's horrible to be so low that we then get low about being low. And not being able to do family either. I am not in Michael's life. I still.can't tell where he is or his inner seeing is. Black and white writing is crap.sometimes. There is no throughflow with the guy but that could mean anything at the low levels every single one of us is still at. But at least in this generation the stone is being lifted a little.and we.are starting to.see the bugs......this is one.stage further on than the previous 2000 years. I am in exactly the same position with a French brother off Facebook. Through contact with our school.revival where he came.as.a.French Assistant, he was born again and baptised in the Spirit but went back to France and became a.switched on kind of evangelical.Catholic priest. There are many throughout the world. But about 5 years ago.I hunted him.down online to Lilles area and he told.me he had bad physical problems.which.made his job almost impossible. I am.never sure with the Catholic.church how.much the vows of allegiance are.actually inviting demons to.wreck our lives because.of all the unconfessed Satanism and evil.deeds that have amassed in the one order for.the last 1600 years but never ever been dealt with or brought into the Light. Surely even walking into.such places is.dangerous, no? You either work as.Jesus in you to expose.Darkness, or.more.likely immediately become.part.of the curses and effects of the disobedience. But without being with this priest and really understanding what is happening with him, I.find it really.difficult to pray effectively for.his worsening physical.condition.
Ern Baxter had two lessons to learn
He told us how when he came into the room with the other Fort Lauderdale brethren he felt at home . Derek Prince,Bob Mumford,Charles Simpson ,John Poole, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shepherding_Movement
Or stronger...he felt he had come home.
Imagine....a kind of reformed presbyterian rejected by his own for being Pentecostal and rejected by Pentecostals for being reformed or stamped with the sovereignty of God among those who were more Arminian.
He was used to fighting his own battles.
Now innstead of brethren out to get him...he had to get used to people being for him and giving him a platform.
That was lesson 1
Lesson 2 as Derek Prince was to articualte was disassociting your selves from the whole crowd.
So how could something so good be so bad?
Well, remember David carrying the Ark back on a new cart?
I don't think anybody ever criticised the Ark.
The evident presence of the Lord among them in the Shepherds Conference of 75 (thats the tapes I heard) and when they came individually amongst our Bible weeks at the height of their calling mid 70s....it was amazing and totally defining for our generation in the UK
But installing pyramid structures like David's new Cart.....where do you get that in scripture?
Shepherding Movement - Wikipedia
(sometimes called the "Discipleship Movement") was an influential and controversial movement within some British, Australian and American
EN.WIKIPEDIA.ORG
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Chris Welch
Chris Welch So in the same way, even to join in prayer around Michael is totally frightening. If we fail it's frightening . If we succeed its frightening.
Nevertheless there are "coming home " moments is what I want ed to say. I have had some recently with John Edwards and Tony Maden among many others.
But i read Peter at the Tranfiguration wanting to make an early framework out of it all....making it into something it wasn't. (Shall we build booths?)
We got very excited about 20 of us to be like a new form of 24 hour church on a collective private Thread on Facebook . it ran almost 2 years to the day. 24hours. 7 days a week. All over the world.
But here we are some 2 and a half years later after it stopped. Rich Novek is with another woman. Linda is dead already.
Various other stuff that was raised en route.
Nevertheless THERE ARE Nehemiah chapter 8 historic get togethers
or Acts 4 when the earth shook
or revivals which some of us have tasted...
which I now call Sovereign Jerusalem Gate 9 events.....the main door the Eastern Gate opens.......come on in fellers!!!
Acts 2 was such a time.
There IS power in the Body praying and declaring.....but the power is not in a
"Lo here lo there KINGDOM"
a Fort Lauderdale pyramid structure
a land of appearances based operation of a "social group"
NO...it always was and always will be NEAR US IN OUR MOUTH.....
so long as each of us take up the Cross to our independent self......and believe upon belief that Galatians 2. 20 is true of us now....whatever the outer appearance looks like.
In that spirit I just ask we be open to pray for Michael, Not even just to stop his pain. Or stop him using the f word. Or even that he start preaching again. As inhuman as this sounds , this is all irrelevant.
(We at Emsworth Bible House reached rockbottom with a paralysed girl that we had "believed for" but still nothijng was happening. Yet we still continued to look after her and support her as a house. She had doctors reports like Tolstoys War and Peace and to crown it all she was allergic to ;light, so when we went in to visit her room we could hardly see her.
Kind of Dickensian stuff, like Lady haversham. We just missed the cobwebs!.
What God did was give her a revelation of Himself. He did His work. Of which healing was a part. Within a year or two she was married and living in Barcelona .
God knows the whole thing, as He did with Job.
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15/5/17
Chris Welch I went up.every day to pray for.a girl paralysed in a head on road collision while young Elim PORTSMOUTH people were holidaying in Cornwall. Then ten years later the woman had been in a coma a month and the mother prayed take her now Lord or raise her. She came out of.the coma and suddenly I.was there from..a.completely different church and town, offering to.come.and.pray every day. I had just had my encounter with God in North Wales so was just making the internal.switchover to follow the Spirit direct and singlehandedly rather than through any apostolic pyramid however good. My church.didn't like this. But really David Swans later book would.highlight this.as.switching from holy place frequencies to pure.source or Holiest Place stuff and like.Jesus in John 4 and John6 and John.7 it throws up problems with all the other people.
This background is important for.this.reason:
In my leftbrain I.don't fully follow.this. But the way things work in the Spirit , intercession are often about something else.
And this may be relevant for.Michaels life.
Job was about something else.entirely but nobody on earth was privy to it. It was revealed in chapter 1 but part of the problem and solution was a barter was going on.
Now as I.went up.every day the Holy Spirit would.point to this and that, reveal some.truth about faith, some new revelation.....it was ever new. There was me, my mother and the girl......and sometimes the mother's best friend, the UK leader.of the Lydia prayer movement.
Then all of.a.sudden I had this download.on Israel which at first glance wasn't related. But the Holy Spirit was indicating otherwise.
He said if.we all.flew to Israel.and.went and prayed in the nearest synagogue to the airport , that as a sign to Israel, God.was going g to restore the break in the girls neck.as.a.sign that the same would be soon so in Israel's own paralysed state, and she too would be reconnected with the Head.
We.got as far as believing for tickets and after the third attempt of phoning I.got some kind of Jewish embassy believer to grant a visa.
Then there was an offense.
You see many times in the gospel synagogue incidents in particular there is the healing, but there is an offense built into the whole.scheme of events.....and people have to choose what they are going to go with.
The offense.was over the prophetic event with the leader at Emsworth which finally got me chucked.out. The same leader advised the mother to have nothing to do with me, and instructed my lodger to steal the plane tickets, which he has been ashamed over ever since.
The paralysed girl.died a year or so later. We got her.from after the coma unable to speak t o speaking and able to go.round in a wheelchair down to Emsworth.
In.some.way Michael's long condition could.be linked to that other intercession that is currently rising ever mightier before the Throne......not for.Israel this time.....But for.unity in the Body of Christ. Michael's body though joined, is in awful pain and.spasms.and this is how the church of the Living God is. It's not a conference prayer for.Charismatics. Charismatics like.evangelicals are the problem. They live in Genesis 3 separation. So.no 5 or.10 minute conference.prayer from.a. Che Ahn or Bill Johnson or the Lakeland.Florida guy is going to touch the unity problem. But connecting as saints with the Head in the Melchisedek Order will. It could be for.this nothing has budged so.far in Michael's life.....and isn't really about him anyway......it's just none of us down here know what is going on or what is planned.
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Chris Welch
Chris Welch That's what I woke up.with
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