For forty years God had been causing us to seek Him. We'd learned His ways, His Person, how to flow from Him. He'd taught us the God way of running meetings. How the Body builds itself. How to live as God's people in community.
In the latter years He'd been showing us a completely new walk from John 15, where He wasn't an "out there God" any more....but from Galations 2:20 , and Christ in us as the Vine-Branch form of His Vine, we now knew Him in His manifestation as us, that is, living our life.
But now, the Big Gun was coming to town. He'd been holding huge meetings for 50 years. In some nations, after his visit, the whole nation had appeared to change over night. And here he was, coming to our church and our town to hold meetings in the centre, within temporary marquees.
Many people came to the Lord. We had several meetings with him always at the centre. He preached strongly and people were convicted. But the more we talked after the meetings, especially into the nights as we unwound from the excitement, the more I slowly realised none of us were quite the same as this guy.
We didn't want to be the centre.
The whole Body was the centre within which Jesus was already glorified.
We didn't "build" churches as the Big Gun seemed to, because we were still getting the blueprint from heaven as to what a church looked like.
We didn't raise money for our ministries, we raised money to give to the poor or towards specific plans that the Lord revealed to us, whether to travel and preach, or for visiting ministries.
We didn't call our ministry by our name, we just called us by the name of our immediate locality, and when some of us moved, by that geographical name.
The Big Gun lived on his own. He said that it was because of his great anointing, but we perceived that it was because he'd never had the "orphan spirit" broken off him. Much of the personal strain that came across in his voice, allbeit with anointing, betrayed the effort he felt he had to put in to somehow present an offering to God "to make both He and God believe in him".
We however had long since learnt that God loves us anyway, and being cradled and absorbed in the magnificent love of God, He literally was thrusting out from our very beings, the need to EXPRESS the GREATNESS of WHAT HE HAD DONE IN US.It's not to say that we didn't put in effort....but like John 4....the more we were driven from our insides, from the Rivers of Living Water, the more we ourselves , like Jesus....felt that as we were giving out....WE OURSELVES WERE EATING A GREAT BIG MEAL. Jesus said to the disciples "I have food to eat that you are unaware of."
The BIG GUN called his work an organization.
We called what God was doing amongst us "family", an extension of God's own interpersonal family of Father Son and Holy Spirit.
We never really knew completely who was in charge among us.
The BIG GUN knew exactly at all times who was in charge.
What we found was that as soon as we had got it figured out, a new anointing would come upon one of us and they would be used to bring the next thing in.
THE BIG GUN preached tithing and lived from this fairly fixed form of income.
We taught giving, and knew that God was well able to move upon different hearts as the work needed finance.
We believed in teaching and doctrine...but our teachings and doctrines were always being turned upside down as the Holy Spirit revealed more.But more than teaching or even specific gifts of the Spirit which were sometimes wackier than those through the BIG GUN, our own single emphasis was to IMPART JESUS, to get people fixed ,rooted , grounded in His Love and Person.
The Big Gun always seemed to know how many would come to know the Lord. He had statistics coming out of his ears. We were very fuzzy by comparison.The BIG GUN seemed to have no statistics however on the number of people walking straight through his works and right out the back door at the rear.
We would notice though, among ourselves, that God moved in seasons. Sometimes a flood. Sometimes people were just growing. Sometimes God was calling individuals to brand new businesses, or to start brand new projects that nobody had done anywhere...but none of these, in their early days made for good enough statistics for the BIG GUN.
Many of the new people enjoyed staying among us after his ministry period ended, but I did notice as I drove the BIG GUN into the airport and carried his bag to the arrivals desk....his eyes were tired, and his expression fixed, and his mouth kind of tailed down at the edges. As he went through customs, he was a very powerful man, but he was very, very alone.
" Unless a seed fall into the ground it abides alone"....maybe the Spirit gives fruit....but the whole fruit bearing plant which should reproduce after its own kind is just not there....everything is just such hard work.
Chris Welch Nov 2012- feel free to reproduce with author name.
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